I Choose Me Enterprises, LLC

I recently went on a retreat with my Business Coach, Darnyelle A. Jervey.  During the retreat she supported us by offering some wonderful exercises to help us renew our thinking.  Our mindsets were challenged to grow and change.  The one thing I was reminded of is the fact that you have to renew your mind daily, hourly, minute by minute……ALWAYS.  I say this, because it is so easy to end up in a self-defeating, doubtful, discouraging position when it comes to your life or business.  If you’re not careful to consider your thoughts, you will find yourself in a position that you really did not want to be in.  You know……the “How did I get here?” moments of your life.

For many years I covered the truth of where I was in my life with excuses and denial rather than facing the truth and doing something about it.  The more I studied the Bible I began to discover a truth that has been shaping my life ever since.  The scriptures constantly remind us to “renew our minds……”  “forgetting those things behind us,”  “let this mind be in you which was in Christ Jesus.”  I knew then that the mind was powerful source to be reckoned with, but that I had the power to change it!  I had to repent!  Most people perceive that repent is about turning from sin; however, repent is the act of changing your mind.

How do you begin to renew your mind?  The Bible is very clear on this.  In Romans 12:2 it tells us to “Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind.  Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.” (N.I.V. Study Bible) It is imperative that we renew our minds if change is to ever take place in our life.  Transformation is change.  In order to get the change (transformation) you want in your life, something in your mind has to change.  Everything begins with a thought.  Whatever you are thinking, is what will manifest or happen in your life.

For many years I thought heavily about what I did not have in my life.  I was constantly complaining about it, talking about it, whining about it, worrying about it, and asking others about it.  I stayed in that situation far too long.  I didn’t realize that the constant attention I gave to my problems were actually recreating my problems over and over and over.  The change I needed did not happen until I began to renew my mind.  Instead of focusing on the problem, I started searching for solutions.  I read about it, asked about it, talked about it and thought heavily about the solutions.  Immediately solutions to my problems started to come to me, and my life began to change.  Everything begins with a thought.  “As a man thinketh in his heart, so is he.” (Proverbs 23:7, KJV)

So how do you begin to change your mind.  Consider what you see, think, hear, do and say.  In considering these things, change came for me when I:

• Began to read the Bible and other books that taught principles in line with the God’s word.  The Bible gives us a picture of who we are and how we should be thinking.  Doing this changed my mind drastically.  I began to say what the Bible said about me and my life, and this ushered a change of thinking which eventually led to a change in my surroundings.
• Secondly, I began to seek out people who thought differently than me, and who were living like I wanted to live.  I associated myself with big thinkers who were doing things that challenged me to live differently.  This was intimidating at first, because I was so accustomed to people who talked with a discouraging tone, who complained about where they were, and who focused largely on what was before them.  These new associations were positive thinkers, faith walkers, prosperous and successful people who believed God and lived the principles of the Bible in a radical way.
• I then sought out people to strengthen me…..people who held me accountable for the change that I declared I wanted for my life.  I found people who were not afraid to hold me accountable with tough love and honesty.

Doing these three things brought about a mindset change that literally changed my life.  Everything around me began to change.  I started a business that I love, became an author, and truly started living the life that I had once only dreamed about.

If you’re ready to change your life by changing your mind, I can help you.  We’ve created several coaching option to help you get what you want quickly to live a life of purpose, passion and productivity.  Let’s get acquainted so that you can start living the life you dream about.

Until next time……….Make it a great day!

I was recently asked, “How do you start living your purpose when you can’t get the people who you are close to going in the same direction you are moving?”  This question really struck a chord with me and I posted my thoughts on facebook…..”You can’t take people where they don’t want to go.  You are responsible for the call (purpose) that is on your life, and it is your duty to become and do all that God has called you to.  Time to release the weight of those who may be slowing you down and go with God.” The post fostered many “likes” and “comments” which made me realize that there are a lot of people who are simply settling to function outside of their purpose, because they are trying to pull other people along with them.

I can easily relate to the question, because this was my burden for many years.  I surrounded myself with people who did not live purposefully and who were always caught in the drama of life….so much so, until they became the “misery” that loved company in my life.  They were always saying things like, “you can’t do that,”  “It won’t work,” “It’s too hard,” etc.  There was always an issue or struggle that led to remaining in the comfort zone of jobs we hated, relationships that were toxic, and activities that were not working for us.  I finally got smart and realized that if I was going to go anywhere, I had to move from the crowd of negative and hook up with people whose lives were governed by purpose and vision.

I must admit, I was afraid.  For the first time in my life I accepted full responsibility for my life, without blaming my husband, friends, family or anyone.  Here are the steps that led to my liberation from negative people:

• Make a list:  Once I decided that I wanted to live a life of purpose and positive expectation I began to look at the people around me.  I was challenged by a mentor to make a list of the people in my circle and decide if these people added value to my life or took away from it in any way.
• Make a Decision:  After making the list, I had the task of making a decision about the people on the list.  Did they lift my life or cast burden?  I had to make a decision based on the truth of who these people were in my life.  I had to tell myself for the first time in my life that I could no longer drag them along, because we wanted different things.  I had to decide to spend less time with them or leave the relationship all together.  I had to make a decision to stop using them as an excuse and EXCUSE myself from the relationship.  I had to decide if I wanted the relationship, or wanted to progress to a purpose-driven place of living.
• Take Action:  Finally I had to take massive action toward the change I wanted in my life.  I hired a life coach to add the motivation and accountability I needed in my life to begin living a purpose-driven life.  I limited my time with people who I found to weigh me down. (They were all thinking, “What’s wrong with Detrell?” since they did not see me that much anymore.)  I ended several relationships all together.  I looked for mentors who I saw living lives governed by purpose, and sought their counsel.

Doing these three things will help you change your life.  These three simple actions have changed my life immensely.  In fact, people who have seen me move from complaining, to living my purpose have now been inspired to do the same.  They, too, changed their circle of friends and began taking steps toward the life that was “Calling” them.

If you’re ready to live out your purpose and get beyond the negative relationships in your life, I can help you.  We’ve created several coaching option to help you get what you want quickly to live a life of purpose, passion and productivity.

If you’d like to learn more we should get acquainted.  Make it a Great Day!

Be Yourself! You only have to tell people who you are when they don’t recognize you behind the mask.

I recently spoke at a Women’s Retreat entitled “Keep It Real….Women’s Retreat!”  The retreat was two days of powerful motivation and inspiration for women to accept their true identity and walk in it!  It was a call to get real…..in other words, “to thine own self be true.”

While there, I talked about something that has truly resignated in my spirit this entire year.  It involved the necessity for us to move beyond our search for Titles into a place of agreement with our assignment in this life.  I run into people all the time, who desire to gain their specific degrees, get promoted to manager, director, etc.  They spend countless hours doing things necessary to gain the Titles they feel are associated with authority, notoriety, or prestige; however, they rarely address the assignment that comes with those titles.

It concerns me that so many people want titles, because of the feeling that comes with it or the notoriety that comes with it, but rarely because of the assignment that comes with it.  In the church, people seek to become Ministers, Elders, Pastors, etc.  In the marketplace people want to be known as the CEO, President, Manager, etc.; however, we rarely see people who seek to do the work without the title.

Your assignment in life is greater than any title that you can ever receive.  Jesus asked, “Who do you say I am?”  He was able to ask this question, because he realized that his work spoke volumes about who he was, not his ability to wear a title.  Your assignment, or your purpose in life, as I like to call it, will speak for itself.  In fact, people who are always seeking the title, but have no works to follow, are ineffective.  They never provoke the real change that needs to happen in the lives of others.  They are the leaders who people don’t want to follow, who delegate their duties and assert their position thru force.

Individuals who receive their assignment in life are passion-driven, sacrificial, persistent, and diligent in their work.  They know that their life has a meaning that has been established…..ordained…by God.  They don’t need a title to do they work, they simply need an opportunity.  They realize that their assignment or purpose is an office assigned to them by God, and that they are equipped to carry it out.

I recall watching Oprah one day, and someone asked why she would not run for president.  She explained that she was able to do more, and make more of a difference as Oprah Winfrey than carrying the title of President of the United States.  She realized the restrictions that come with some titles, especially if the title is not given by God.

When I became a Women’s purpose life coach and motivational speaker people who had always known me remarked, “That is so you, Detrell.”  I ran into an old friend on last week and she said, “I always knew you would be doing something like that, because that is who you always were.”  You don’t need a title to start doing something that makes a difference; you simply need to understand your God Ordained assignment on this earth.  You have to know that you were called and chosen by God to be and do something great.  When I say Great, I don’t mean by man’s standards.  Your great work might change the life of 10 who end up changing the life of millions, while someone else might have the assignment to feed the worlds hungry, or teach, preach, build, empower, etc.  Whatever your call, don’t waste your life seeking Titles to impress men.  Seek to connect with the assignment attached to your life, and your work will speak for you.

If you’re ready to connect with your purpose in a big way, I’d love to support you by sharing the tools and strategies that helped me understand my purpose and start living the life that I was destined to live. Let’s get acquainted and start your purpose driven life plan today.  Email me at detrellhawkins@yahoo.com so we can get started.

People who are always talking and never doing lack confidence. Walking in your purpose requires action, which requires confidence. You must believe in you.